Hi ❤️

If you genuinely think of this boy as a friend in the same way you think of your girl friends, then it's understandable that you might feel comfortable around him and not think much of it.

What matters is that you feel safe, comfortable and respected, and that he sees the situation in the same way. Friendships can be different for everyone, and some friends are naturally more relaxed around each other than others.

It's also worth remembering that not everyone feels comfortable being naked or changing in front of friends, regardless of whether they're boys or girls, and that's okay too. We all have different boundaries. The important thing is that you're never doing anything because you feel pressured, and that both people are happy with the boundaries of the friendship.

From what you've said, it doesn't sound weird. It sounds like you trust him and feel comfortable around him. Just keep checking in with yourself about what feels right for you, and make sure that trust and respect go both ways.

Healthy friendships are built on feeling safe, respected and able to be yourself.

Vicki ❤️

Hi ❤️

This isn't a stupid question at all. Break-ups and changing feelings can be really confusing, especially when someone has been a big part of your life.

From what you've said, I think the first thing to ask yourself is whether you miss him, or whether you miss having someone to text, think about, and spend time with. Those can feel very similar, but they're actually quite different.

It sounds as though you no longer have the same romantic feelings you once did, but now there's a bit of a gap where that relationship used to be. When we're feeling bored, lonely, or at a loose end, it's completely normal to start missing an ex, even if getting back together isn't what we really want.

You may find it helpful to fill your diary with things you enjoy for a couple of weeks. Arrange to see friends, spend time with family, focus on hobbies, or try something new. Then see how you feel. If you're still thinking about him and genuinely miss his company rather than the relationship itself, that tells you something important.

If that's the case, there's no harm in reaching out to see how he is. Just be honest with yourself first about what you want. If friendship is all you're interested in, make that clear from the start so he doesn't get the wrong idea or think you're hoping to get back together.

And remember, life feeling a little boring after a crush or relationship ends doesn't necessarily mean you've made the wrong decision. Sometimes it just takes a while to adjust to having that space back in your life.

Be kind to yourself. Relationships come and go, but learning what you want from them is all part of growing up. ❤️

Hi ❤️

It can be really confusing trying to work out whether a boy likes you because everyone shows their feelings differently.

Some boys are very obvious and will find reasons to talk to you, spend time with you, or always seem to be nearby. Others can be much harder to read. In fact, some boys get so nervous around someone they like that they might tease you, act awkward, or even pretend they don't like you at all!

You may also notice that a boy goes a bit red when he sees you, struggles to find the right words, laughs more than usual, or seems extra interested in what you're doing and saying. Sometimes they'll remember little details you've told them or try to make you smile.

The truth is there isn't one sign that guarantees a boy likes you. Everyone behaves differently when they have a crush, especially during the teen years when confidence can be all over the place.

It can help to look for a pattern rather than focusing on one thing. If he regularly seems interested in you, enjoys being around you, and makes an effort to get your attention, there's a good chance he likes you.

Vicki ❤️

Hi ❤️

Firstly, it's really lovely to hear that you respect different religions and believe everyone is entitled to their own beliefs. The world would be a much kinder place if everyone thought that way.

From what you've said, I can understand why people were upset. If you're in a Catholic school and someone is openly commenting on beliefs that are important to other people, it's understandable that some students might feel hurt or offended. At the same time, being Muslim isn't the issue here. People can have different beliefs and still respect each other.

It sounds like the real problem isn't that G has a different religion, it's that she may have been speaking about other people's beliefs in a way that felt unkind or disrespectful. Everyone is entitled to their opinions, but it's important to remember that everyone deserves respect too, whether they're Catholic, Muslim, another religion, or no religion at all.

Sometimes people say things without realising how much they've upset others. If the teachers are involved, I'd trust them to help sort things out. For now, I wouldn't let it worry you too much. If you enjoy being around her and she treats you kindly, there's no reason you can't still be friendly towards her.

As for the singing question 😂🎭

When people say "don't sing from your throat", they mean try not to force the sound or squeeze your throat muscles. Instead, take a nice deep breath so your tummy expands slightly, then let the air support your voice as you sing.

A few simple tips:

• Stand up tall with your shoulders relaxed.
• Take a deep breath into your tummy, not your chest.
• Open your mouth a bit more than feels natural.
• Speak the words clearly before singing them.
• Don't try to sing louder by straining your throat.
• Practise little and often rather than singing for hours.

You may find it helps to imagine the sound coming from your chest and tummy area rather than being pushed out of your throat. The more you practise, the more natural it becomes.

And honestly? If you've got a show coming up, the most important thing is to have fun and enjoy yourself. Confidence and enthusiasm often shine through even more than having the "perfect" singing technique. 🎶✨

Good luck with your musical theatre show! I'm sure you'll be brilliant.

Vicki ❤️

Hi ❤️

From what you've said, it sounds like you're starting to wonder whether you're ready to spend more time in lessons, and that's a really important thing to think about. 💖

The truth is, I don't know why you're currently working with a teacher instead of attending lessons, and there may be good reasons why the school has put that support in place.

My advice would be to talk to your parents, your teacher, and perhaps the headteacher about how you're feeling. You could say something like:

"I'm wondering if I'm ready to try going into some lessons, or maybe to build up to it gradually."

You don't have to go from zero lessons to a full timetable overnight. Sometimes schools can arrange a gradual plan, where you try one or two lessons first and see how you get on.

It's also worth asking yourself:

• Do I want to go to lessons because I miss being with other students?
• Am I feeling more confident than I used to?
• Is there anything I'm worried about if I do go back?

Your answers might help you work out what feels right for you.

Whatever the reason you've been working separately, your feelings matter, and it's okay to tell the adults supporting you that you're thinking about a change. They know your situation much better than I do and can help you make the best decision.

Vicki ❤️

Hi Carmen❤️

I'm sorry this has happened, it really hurts when people you thought were your friends make you feel left out or as though they're choosing someone else over you. From what you've said, it sounds like you're feeling both angry and disappointed, and that's completely understandable.

The first thing I'd say is try not to make any big decisions while you're upset. Sometimes people say things through other people, and the story isn't always exactly how it happened. If you feel able to, have a calm chat with Z and J and simply say something like:

"'A' told me that we might be getting a new addition to the group, that will be really cool to have new friends join us."

This lets them know you are aware of what's being said without revealing every detail of what A is sharing.

Also remember that being reasonable and standing up for yourself doesn't make you rude. Sometimes people don't like being challenged when they're being unkind, but that doesn't mean you've done anything wrong.

As for the group chat, I'd be tempted to take the pressure off it. Group chats can feel like the centre of the world when you're at school, but real friendship is about how people treat you, not whether your name is in a chat. If A is truly your best friend, focus on that friendship rather than trying to win over people who may not be treating you kindly.

And one more thing, Carmen... if Z and J do remove you, that will say a lot more about them than it does about you. A good friend doesn't make someone feel excluded for fun.

Hold your head high, be polite, let them know you know what's going on, and don't give them the satisfaction of seeing you beg to stay. You deserve friends who actually make you feel welcome. 

Vicki ❤️

Hi ❤️

It sounds like today has felt really overwhelming, and honestly, I don't think you're upset because your friends are on an art trip. I think you're upset because your safe people aren't around today, and that's left you feeling a bit alone with all those worries that usually get quieter when they're there.

First of all, please don't be hard on yourself. Feeling emotional when your closest friends are away doesn't make you "too sensitive". It just means those friendships matter a lot to you. ❤️

From what you've said, I'd be willing to bet that your friends aren't leaving you on read because they don't like you. They're probably busy travelling, doing activities, talking to teachers, taking photos and enjoying the day. When people are caught up in something exciting, they often don't check their messages as much as usual.

The thing that stood out to me was when you said: "I overthink about if my friends even like me constantly." That sounds exhausting. 💖

When we're already worried that people might not like us, every little thing can start to feel like proof that it's true. A delayed reply becomes "they're ignoring me", when in reality they're probably just busy.

I'm really glad your mum encouraged you to go out with her. That was actually a brilliant thing to do. Rather than staying at home with your thoughts all day, you got out and spent time with someone who cares about you.

For now, try to focus on doing things that make you feel happy while your friends are away. Watch a favourite programme, read, draw, listen to music, go for a walk, or spend some time with family. The trip won't last forever.

And do you know what? When your friends are back tomorrow or next week, there's a very good chance you'll all be chatting as normal and you'll look back and realise your brain was being much harsher on you than your friends ever were.

Vicki ❤️

Hi ❤️

Oh dear, that's really upsetting, especially when you trusted your friend with something personal. It sounds like she shared your news without thinking about how it would make you feel, and it's completely understandable that you're feeling embarrassed or annoyed.

The thing is, what's done is done now, and while I can't know whether she told people out of excitement or because she wasn't thinking, she did break your trust. That's a shame.

But please don't feel embarrassed about having your period. Periods are a normal part of growing up, and every girl in your year will either have started hers already or will do at some point. You have absolutely nothing to be ashamed of. ❤️

Hold your head high. If someone brings it up, you could simply roll your eyes and say:

"Yep, I got my period. Not sure why it became school news, but I'm totally fine with it."

Or even:

"It's just a period. It's really not that exciting!"

Often when we act confident about something, people lose interest very quickly and move on to the next bit of gossip.

As for your friend, you might want to have a quiet word with her and say something like:

"I trusted you with that, and I was upset that you told other people."

A good friend should understand and apologise.

Remember, the embarrassing part isn't that you got your first period. The embarrassing part is someone sharing something that wasn't theirs to share.

You've done nothing wrong, and I promise this will feel like a much bigger deal to you than it does to everyone else. 

Vicki ❤️

Hi ❤️

From what you've said, it doesn't sound like you've done anything wrong.

It sounds as though your friend often pretends to be upset or annoyed with you, but then says she's joking once you've started feeling bad about it. Even if she means it as a joke, if it happens all the time and leaves you feeling upset, it's understandable that you're finding it hard.

With what happened today, it sounds like you spotted your other friends in the crowd and moved towards them, then called your friend over when you realised she wasn't with you. That doesn't sound like you were trying to run away from her.

If this keeps happening, you could try saying something like:

"I don't mind jokes, but when you keep acting upset with me, I end up worrying I've done something wrong."

A good friendship shouldn't leave you feeling confused or guilty all the time.

From what you've told me, I don't think you were wrong, and I think it's okay to let your friend know how her jokes are making you feel. ❤️

Vicki ❤️

Hi ❤️

It can be difficult for parents to let go of their children and allow them to become more independent, and this is almost certainly how your mom feels right now. I know that doesn't make it any less frustrating, especially when you've started at a new school and are trying to make new friends.

From what you've said, it sounds as though you were being really responsible. You were willing to follow rules, check in regularly and make sensible choices. Sometimes parents worry not because they don't trust you, but because they can't be completely sure about the situation or what other people might be doing.

I wonder if there is another friend who is going whose mum could speak to your mom and reassure her about who will be there and how the party is being supervised. Sometimes hearing from another parent can help.

Try not to worry too much about missing one event. The good news is that there will be lots of other opportunities to spend time with your friends. And no, you're definitely not too old for trick-or-treating if that's something you still enjoy! Plenty of people in Year 9 celebrate Halloween that way, have a movie night, carve pumpkins or get together with friends for a Halloween-themed evening.

I know you're disappointed, and that's completely understandable, but try talking to your mom calmly about how important making friends is to you. Let her know you're not upset because of the party itself, but because you're trying to build friendships at your new school.

Vicki ❤️

Hi ❤️

First of all, what's the rush? Crushes can be such fun, and you don't have to make things serious straight away.

For now, just be yourself. When you see him, smile and chat to him. Take the opportunity to get to know him a little better and let him get to know you too. It doesn't have to be flirty. At this stage, it's really just about building a friendship and seeing how you get on.

If you both like each other and enjoy spending time together, the next step will often happen quite naturally without you having to overthink it. Try to enjoy having a crush rather than worrying too much about where it's heading.

Vicki ❤️

Hi ❤️

Thank you for being so honest. Reading your message, it sounds like you've been carrying a lot of hurt for a long time, and I think it's important to say this first: none of what happened to you was your fault.

From what you've said, it sounds like you've been struggling with your confidence for several years, and that's a lot for anyone to carry. Realising that you were being bullied can bring back lots of feelings, even years later, and it's completely understandable that this has affected how you see yourself.

I'm really glad your new school helped you feel more comfortable and able to be yourself. One unkind person doesn't change your worth, even if they have brought back some difficult thoughts and feelings.

What worries me most is that you've thought about self-harm in the past. You don't have to cope with those feelings alone. Please talk to a trusted adult, school counsellor, teacher, parent, family member or doctor about how you're feeling. You deserve support.

Try not to be too hard on yourself about your weight either. We are all different, and if you're naturally taller than many of your friends, it makes sense that you'll weigh a little more too. Your value is not measured by a number on a scale.

For now, focus on looking after yourself, spending time with people who make you feel good about who you are, eating regularly, and doing things you enjoy. And remember, being sensitive isn't a weakness. It means you care deeply, and that's something to be proud of.

Vicki ❤️

Hi ❤️

Crushes are exciting, aren't they? And sometimes a little overwhelming too!

From what you've said, it sounds like you've only known each other for a couple of weeks, but you've already discovered that you have loads in common. Being good friends first is actually a really lovely place to start because it takes some of the pressure away.

The good news is that you don't have to do anything right now. You don't need to confess your feelings immediately or try to work out every little sign. Just enjoy spending time with him, chatting in lessons, and getting to know him better.

You're also absolutely right that it's not a good idea to assume someone likes you back. Sometimes people are naturally friendly, and sometimes they do have a crush. The only way to know for sure is with time and communication.

For now, try to:

• Enjoy the friendship.
• Keep talking and having fun together.
• See whether he makes an effort to spend time with you too.
• Let things develop naturally.

You may find that one day one of you says something a little more flirty, or lets on that your feelings are more than friendship. Often these things happen much more naturally than we expect.

And remember, even if he doesn't end up liking you in that way, you've still made a friend who shares your interests, which is pretty special too.

So my advice is simple: relax, enjoy the friendship, and don't rush it. If the feelings are there on both sides, it will usually become clearer with time.

Vicki ❤️

Hi ❤️

It sounds like you're stuck between two really difficult feelings. On one hand, those messages are precious because they remind you of someone who meant a lot to you. On the other, seeing them right now can make the hurt feel fresh all over again. That's completely normal.

For now, why not archive, hide or lock his number and your messages so they're out of sight without being gone forever? That way you're not constantly coming across them when you open your contacts or messages, but you also aren't making a permanent decision that you might regret later.

If you're connected on social media, you could also mute, unfollow or hide his posts and stories for a while. Most platforms let you do this without unfriending or blocking someone. Having fewer reminders can make it easier to give yourself the space you need to heal.

The other thing I'd encourage is keeping yourself busy, even when you don't particularly feel like it. Make plans with friends or family, try a new hobby, go for walks, watch a series you've been meaning to start, or focus on things you've put aside. The goal isn't to forget him overnight. It's to gradually build a life that feels full again.

And try not to put pressure on yourself to "be over it" by a certain date. Healing from a breakup isn't a sprint, it's a marathon. Some days you'll feel okay, and other days you'll miss him terribly. That doesn't mean you're moving backwards.

The good news is that, with time, the messages often become less painful to keep. In a few months, you might find you're ready to delete them. Or you might decide to keep them stored away as part of your history. You don't have to make that decision today.

Vicki ❤️

Hi ❤️

Firstly, try not to worry about what the online test says. Online quizzes can't diagnose depression or anxiety, and only a healthcare professional can do that.

However, from what you've said, it sounds like your friend is really struggling at the moment. If she's feeling very low, anxious, and is self-harming, it's important that she talks to a trusted adult as soon as possible. This could be a parent, carer, teacher, school nurse or another adult she feels comfortable with.

Let her know that she's not alone and that there is support available. You can be a good friend by listening and encouraging her to reach out for help, but please remember that this is not something you should carry on your shoulders by yourself.

If you're worried about her safety, or if she isn't willing to tell an adult, I would encourage you to speak to a trusted adult yourself. She might be upset initially, but getting her support is far more important than keeping a secret when someone could be at risk.

Vicki ❤️

Hi ❤️

It's really kind of you to care about your friend. From what you've said, it sounds like she's scratching herself to cope with difficult feelings, and that's something she shouldn't have to deal with on her own.

Try to gently encourage her to talk to a parent, carer, teacher, school counsellor or another trusted adult about how she's feeling. Let her know she's not in trouble and that there are people who can help.

You can be there to listen and support her, but it's important to remember that this isn't something you should have to handle by yourself. If you're still worried about her, or if she tells you she's carrying on hurting herself, please speak to a trusted adult yourself, even if she asks you not to. Her safety is the most important thing.

The good news is that help is available for self-harm, and with the right support, things can get better.

Vicki ❤️

Hi ❤️

Try not to worry. Friendships often change a little during the teenage years, and sometimes people stop doing certain jokes, emojis or habits as they get older. It doesn't necessarily mean anything is wrong.

From what you've said, your friend still talks to you, especially when you're together with your other friend, which is a good sign. She may just be changing how she communicates or feeling a bit self-conscious.

If it's really bothering you, you could casually ask if everything is okay, but I'd try not to overthink the finger hearts or the "x" at the end of messages. Moving from primary school to secondary school can be a big adjustment for everyone.

The good news is that this sounds more like a friendship changing than a friendship ending.

Vicki ❤️

Hi ❤️

It's lovely that you want to help your friend. Periods can sometimes last longer than expected, especially in the first few years after they start, but bleeding continuously for a whole month is quite a long time.

I'd gently encourage your friend to talk to her mum, dad, carer, or another trusted adult as soon as possible. They can help her decide whether she should speak to a doctor, particularly if the bleeding is heavy, she's feeling tired, dizzy, faint, or if the bleeding isn't showing any signs of stopping.

For your part, the best thing you can do is be there for your friend, listen to her concerns, and encourage her to get support from an adult she trusts. Sometimes just knowing someone cares can make a big difference.

Vicki ❤️

Hi ❤️

You've been honest with this boy, and that was the kindest thing you could do. It can feel awful knowing someone is disappointed or upset, but it would have been far more hurtful to carry on with the relationship when you weren't ready for it.

It sounds like you handled the situation maturely by being honest about your feelings and the fact that you didn't have the time for a relationship right now. Being honest isn't the same as being unkind.

My advice would be to give him some space to process his feelings and avoid sending messages out of guilt, as that could give him the impression that you've changed your mind. If you see him, a friendly smile and being polite is absolutely fine, but don't feel responsible for fixing his disappointment.

For now, focus on yourself, your friends, your family and the things that make you happy. If you're not ready for a relationship, that's completely okay. There is no rush to date, and it's important to do things at a pace that feels right for you.

Vicki ❤️

Hi ❤️

It sounds like you're already making progress, even if it doesn't feel that way. A month is still quite early after a breakup, especially when you truly loved someone.

The honest answer is yes, it will get easier. Right now, you're adjusting, so thinking about him often is completely normal. Over time, those thoughts will become less frequent, and the hurt won't feel as intense.

Try not to pressure yourself to stop thinking about him. Healing takes time, and it's okay to miss someone while moving forward.

Be patient with yourself. The fact you're doing a bit better now than you were a month ago shows that you're already healing, one step at a time. 

Vicki ❤️