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The Lil-Lets Friendship Guide

Friendships during puberty can be challenging. At Lil-Lets, we understand the importance of having supportive friends during this time of change. That's why we've created a guide to help you navigate these special relationships and overcome any misunderstandings that may happen.

Learn To Share

Opening up to friends about how you're feeling can strengthen your bond and provide mutual support during teen and pre-teen years. It's likely that your friends are going through similar experiences, and sharing your feelings can create a sense of connection and understanding among you.

Remember, trust is the basis of any strong friendship. By reassuring your friends that they can confide in you and promising to keep private conversations confidential, you're showing your commitment to their trust and strengthening your friendship.

Learn From Friends

Friends who are dedicated to their studies or passionate about sports and hobbies are positive role models who can inspire and motivate us to excel. So, rather than ridiculing them, it's important to appreciate their dedication and learn from their positive attitude to life.

When we admire and learn from our friends' dedication and passion, we're inspired to push ourselves out of our comfort zones and strive for greatness. Whether it's joining a new club, improving your grades, or taking on a new hobby, positive friends can provide the encouragement and support we need to take those important steps forward.

Learn To Give A Compliment

It sounds obvious, doesn’t it? But so many of us nowadays forget to be nice to each other, so when you notice something positive about a friend, whether it's their outfit, performance in sports, or a change in hairstyle, don't hesitate to offer a sincere compliment. Your words of encouragement can boost their confidence, brighten their day, and strengthen your bond with them.

And if someone gives you a compliment learn to take it!  Say “Thank You” instead of dismissing the compliment as nonsense.

Shut Down Gossip?

Resist the temptation to get involved in gossip or speaking about old and new friends behind their backs, there really is no need for this. And steer clear of any new friends that seem to love to engage in gossip too! Here’s our Gossip Beating Tips.

  • Try to steer the conversation in a different direction by introducing a new topic or asking a question unrelated to the gossip. This helps shift the focus away without directly confronting it.
  • Set your own boundaries and let others know that you won't tolerate speaking negatively about someone behind their back.
  • Lighten the mood and diffuse tension by using humour to address the gossip. You can make a light-hearted comment or joke to gently steer the conversation in a different direction.
  • If the gossip involves a problem or argument amongst friends, focus on finding solutions rather than dwelling on the past.
  • Be a role model, if the gossip continues and you feel is getting out of hand, have a quiet word with the individuals involved and let them know how it’s impacting you or others in the group.

Learn Something New

Get out of the habit of rejecting something new and be open-minded and willing to try new things, Friends will often have different views and likes based on their home life, so try something that you would never have considered before….you never know you might like it, and if you don’t well at least you can say you gave it a go.

It could be something as simple as listening to a new band your friend likes, reading a book they recommend, trying a new activity such as ice-skating or rock climbing, or even eating something you do not generally eat at home, such as sushi, or Mexican food. These new experiences can only make your world more interesting for being introduced to them.

So, next time your friend suggests something new, step out of your comfort zone and embrace the opportunity with enthusiasm and curiosity. You never know what you might discover or how it might positively impact your life.

Learn To Take Criticism

Friends can be blunt if they think you are making a mistake or doing something that could be harmful or risky. Listen to their advice, you may not take it, but they do this out of genuine care for your well-being and can often see something you are unable to see because they are not so closely involved.

When offering advice to a friend, it's crucial to do so in a supportive and constructive manner. Instead of criticizing or pointing out flaws, focus on highlighting the positives and offering suggestions for improvement. By sharing your thoughts positively, you can help your friend feel encouraged and inspired to make positive changes. For example, saying “I hate your hairstyle today”, will only cause conflict and upset someone’s feelings. Instead say, “I really loved your hair the way you had it the other day, it was so pretty, you should wear it more like that.”

Girl Thinking Sad

Say 'No' To Peer Pressure

It’s great having friends around your age who share your interests and you can chat to and it’s only natural that you will listen to their advice and learn from it. But what about when that advice starts to change into something less fun and you feel pressured to act, think or look a different way. This is then called Peer Pressure.

Even if others in your group have decided to join in, don’t feel this means you should, simply because everyone else is doing something, doesn’t make it right!

Say No with Confidence: If you're being pressured to do something that goes against your values or better judgment, don't be afraid to say no. Saying no can be difficult, but it's important to stick to your boundaries and what you believe is right for you.

Be Assertive and Respectful: When saying ‘no’ be respectful of your friends' views. Recognise their views whilst standing firm in your decision. This shows that you value their opinion but are also confident in your own choices.

Be Individual and Confident: Embrace your individuality and resist the pressure to conform. You don't have to dress or act a certain way to fit in with a group. Be confident in who you are and what makes you unique.

Stand Up to Serious Requests: If you're pressured to take part in risky or dangerous activities, like smoking, drinking alcohol, or engaging in sexual activity, stand firm in your decision to say ’No’. These behaviours can have serious consequences, and it's important to prioritise your well-being above peer pressure.

If you are at a party and feel under pressure, call home, and ask your parents or another trusted adult to come and collect you, or give your friends examples of people who have regretted doing these things, letting them know you’re way too smart to make the same mistakes.

Find Like-Minded Friendships: If your current friendship group is putting too much pressure on you, consider finding friends who share your interests and values. Surround yourself with people who support and respect you for who you are without trying to change you.

Speak Up for Others: If you see someone else being pressured, don't hesitate to step in and speak up for them. Offer support and encouragement and let them know that they're not alone.

Remember, true friendships are built on mutual respect, trust, and support and don't be afraid to stand up for yourself and others in the face of peer pressure.

Not All Friends Are Best Friends

Accept that not everyone will be your close friend, and that's okay. Just because you may not feel a strong connection with someone in your group or occasionally argue with them doesn't mean you have to exclude them or try to force them out of the group. Instead accept that you’re most likely never going to be close friends, be polite and learn to understand we are all different but can still get along.

Keeping And Making Friends

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